Since Valentine’s Day is coming up fast, I’ve decided to a quick rundown of my top 4 sports themed romcoms. Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman : )
Jerry Maguire– Does Cruise Make The Cut? (A-) (1996)
Jerry Maguire is considered by many to be the pinnacle of the sports-themed rom com. The A-list cast, the football backdrop and let’s all join in a chorus of the film’s insanely quoted lines: “You had me at hello”, “Show me the money”, “You complete me” and the the ever-poignant though not nearly as quoted, “You shoplifted the pootie”.
The film also boasts the high-energy, scene stealing, Oscar-winning performance of Cuba Gooding Junior as Cardinal’s Receiver Rod Tidwell, the excellently smug performance of Jay Mohr as the dick-agent, and the adorable, quote spewing kid actor Jonathan Lipnicki as “Ray”. In addition, this film contains the birth of the Rene Zellweger Rom Com Archetype: a woman who makes up for her all her partner’s deficits and, by default, carries the emotional heft of the film. In Jerry Maguire, Zellwegger certainly does the ‘acting for two’ alternately beaming and crying as the situation demands. Tom Cruise, however is the film’s one half-sour note for me. Although its refreshing to see the usually capable cruise struggling and down and out its next to impossible for me to feel real sympathy for him onscreen. His whole and well-honed image in film is someone who quickly masters and excels in any situation. (Top Gun, Mission Impossible) He has the opposite of a sad-sack, hang dog persona. For me, Cruise has the opposite image as someone like Paul Giamatti. Whenever you see Paul Giamatti onscreen you automatically assume the man is riddled with problems. The script does try and compensate for Cruise’s image by making his character somewhat of a cold romantic cookie; straining to connect emotionally to women. Yet, still in attendance is Cruises trademark grin, shades, and perky, upbeat temperament. Ultimately, its these concessions to the Cruise Trademarks that also keep the viewer at a distance and keep Zelwegger working double-time to establish a true connection.
- Also of note is the film’s great score. The music choreographs and punches up each beat of the film and the more lush compositions bolster-up even Cruise’s workmanlike/yet ultimately half-baked romantic epiphanies.
The Cutting Edge– (B+) Chemistry trumps Cliche (1992)
Cliches abound in The Cutting Edge. Ubiquitous skate coach with thick bogus Russian Accent a la Boris from Rocky & Bullwinkle, overprotective dad (A la every film where kid shows a talent at something) and protagonists overcompensating for some deficit (Dude skater has some kind of a corneal deficiency, chick skater is perfectionistic yet self-sabotaging). Yet, the great chemistry of the lead actors is more than enough to ‘hit the net’. The film’s stars, D.B. Sweeny (Doug Dorsey) and Moira Kelly (Kate Mosely…like that Kate/Skate similarity, ha!) have a real Sam/Diane (Cheers) or Dave/Maddie (Moonlighting)dynamic that scores and makes up for predictable plot and sub-standard script.
I have no clue if the actors dug each other in real life but they have a competitive bickering relationship and sexual tension that really jumps off the screen and gives their scenes the kick they need.
The film is hampered a bit by the stock footage feel of some of the skating sequences and the wooden ringside analysis by the commentators: ” This is the duo’s best skate yet”, “They’re moving effortlessly across the ice”.
Also frustrating is the script’s insistence that the couple has to have a big fight, air their grievances, or confess their hidden love seconds before a big skating competition. I understand the film’s desire to ramp up the drama but I am relatively certain that, if I was a competitive figure skater functioning at a high level, I’d want to maintain a relatively tame regimen right before I went out on the ice. Needless to say, I’d abstain from calling my partner an asshole, complaining about their breath, or that I secretly wanted to jump their bones. In essence, seconds before a big match I would just want to try to mellow the fuck out.
Wimbledon (B) Odd Casting Serves Up A Winner (2004)
Wimbledon offers up an assemblage of idiosyncratic actors to mostly positive results. Kirsten Dunst, not ordinarily a particularly warm or effervescent screen presence, has never been more cool or likable than as tennis prodigy, Lizzie Bradbury. She loosens up quite a bit . Maybe Dunst truly feels at home on the court or, who knows, maybe the film’s Craft Services Team decided to add a little weed to her morning bran muffin. Paul Bettany as ”Peter colt” normally plays stuffy and intense roles. In Wimbledon he is able to imbue his part with nimble comedic timing and a self effacing quality than pairs well with Dunst’s more headstrong presence. Suddenly, though, When the film is nearly done, actor/producer John Favreau makes a distracting appearance as Peter’s exploitive manager, Ron Roth. Favreau made a similar and equally unnecessary visit to the cast of Something’s Gotta Give as a book agent. I’m not sure what makes casting teams think Favreau seems ”agenty” I suppose people who don’t possess matinee idol looks are either lumped ‘best friend’ or ‘pushy agent categories’. Without being blunt or hurtful, I have never heard someone exiting a movie theater audibly bemoan, “The film just needed more Favreau”
Bull Durham (c+) Folksy Yet Pretentious (1988)
I have often thought Bull Durham was over-rated. In the year it was released it was hailed as an authentic behind-the-scenes look at semi-pro baseball with standout performances by Sarandon as a sexy baseball enthusiast and Kostner as the worldly wise mentor to a dimwitted, yet talented pitcher (Tim Robbins).
I found the performances overly precious, cornball, and wildly overwritten. In the film, when Annie Savoy (Susan Sarandon) asks Crash Davis (Kevin Kostner) what he believes in. He responds with a speech that is over-ripe, out of character, and obviously crafted by a writer. He Says:”Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman’s back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astro-turf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.”Yipes, what a potpourri! and that reference to Susan Sontag is completely out of the blue. Why would a ballplayer be reading, and subsequently form a quick disgust the works of a feminist author, Susan Sontag anyway? Did he take some kind of a “Women’s Studies” class at NYU’s School Of Continuing Education or something?
Ultimately, if Kostner’s character Crash Davis minor league catcher, was truly smart/gifted enough to come up with this whole speech off-the-cuff, I think he should have given up baseball to work the nation-wide lecture circuit like Will Rogers.
Sarandon’s over-the-top, poetry reading sexpot seems more a product of a Tennessee Williams Play than a small time baseball fan. She purrs, pouts, and makes Julie Newmar’s performance as Batwoman seem positively naturalistic by comparison.
Fever Pitch-(C -) A swing and a miss (1997)
Fever Pitch presents a very relatable sports v girlfriend dilemma but the casting undercuts the promising premise. Unfortunately, The film’s stars, Jimmy Fallon and Drew Barrymore never seem to rise above anything more than a friend-zone vibe. Their scenes together, while playful, lack any romantic intensity. There’s no lusty build-up. As a viewer, you mildly root for them together just because they seem like nice people. Its sweet that Fallon’s character cleans up Barrymore’s vomit and takes her parents out for a night on the town. But her favorite uncle could do that too! They duo just never connect on any deeper, physical level. It doesn’t help that Both Barrymore and Fallon give off very innocent, juvenile vibes onscreen. The love scenes, such as they are, are sophomoric; hurried, brief, and un-cinematic. I would would never think of casting these guys in anything even remotely sexy…forget a “50 Shades of gray movie”…unless there’s one scene where the couple have to “giggle or noogie there way to orgasm”. Then, Fallon and Barrymore are a go! Also, I never bought Fallon as a Sox fan. His personality is too upbeat and mercurial. He lacks the intensity that’s missing when he’s watching Sox games. He’s also missing the worried, beaten-down vibe that I would associate with a long term ultra- fan of a perpetually losing team like The Red Sox. Simply, he appears too jovial to be a Sox Fan.
I never accepted the film’s premise that Drew Barrymore is a career driven businesswoman. The “Fifty First Dates” Star has an frazzled ditz quality that she never seems to be able to shake no matter what she’s called on to do in a film. Luckily enough, most films, like this one, don’t ever require break out of this mold. You’ll never see Barrymore cast as someone who pioneers a new type of thinking or discovers the cure for anything. Madame Curie, she’s not. Now, in real life She might have a high IQ and do exceptionally well on standardized tests, but put her in any film, even one starring Keanu Reeves, it would be a fight-to-the-death to see who seems the dumbest.
Mark Levitt Comedy Writer 